1. Guessing your clothes size instead of saying you don’t know

There is nothing wrong with not being sure of what size you are in shirts, dresses and any other number of clothes. The human body is always changing. We as fashion stylists and human beings understand this. What we don’t understand is why you would have us grab seven different sizes of jeans when we are the ones who will have to put them all back at the end of the day. Not cute.

2. Bad hygeine

One time a gentlemen with horrible dandruff asked to try on several hats. I could not refuse him. We had to damage every single one out. Also, bathing and wearing deodorant is essential in any situation, especially if you are trying on clothes you may not purchase. No one should have to smell your naked B.O. from the fitting room halfway across the store. It is not fair to the employees or your fellow customers.

3. Making a mess of things for no apparent reason

Remember every shirt you just “want to see” must be refolded by another employee, whose manager has to check them out at the end of the night. It’s fine if you take things off the racks or take a sweater off the table, just please put it back.

Adding to that – Ruining a whole stack of folds

Folding clothes is the most time consuming task in keeping the floor up to corporate standards. The edges of every pair of folded shirts and pants need to be exactly even. If you know you can’t fold clothes well, instead of ruining a whole stack of to find your size, feel free to ask an associate for assistance. That’s what they are there for and they would be more than happy to help you. They would also appreciate that you asked.

4. Trying to haggle. Everything.

You’re broke. We get it. We most likely are too, depending on which store we work at. But we can’t change the price for you. In rare cases, a manager might be able to. But the bottom line is, if you can’t afford it, ask us for an alternative. If we don’t have it, we can probably direct you to another brand that does.

5. Staying too long after the store closes

We have friends, lovers, children, siblings, errands, plans and LIVES. It is understandable if you need an extra ten minutes after we close to make your final decisions and get to the register. But when you’re pushing it longer, that’s just inconsiderate. Especially if you know we can’t and wont ask you to leave. Unlike Nicki.

6. Not believing us

If we don’t have your size in that shoe, we don’t have it. Why would we lie? We want you to have the shoe too (especially if we are working on commission). Yes we can check other stores for you, we we might have it online. But please don’t ask another associate to go look for you. If anything, just ask a manager if you don’t believe us.

7. Hearing what you want to hear instead of what was actually said to you

I would never tell you an item that is marked 15% off is actually 50% off. Hunny, don’t even try causing a scene. I won’t fall for it, my boss won’t fall for it and the other customers watching you probably won’t even fall for it. Getting that worked up isn’t a good look on you. Just don’t.
Also, a sign that says “SALE – up to 70% off!” means exactly that – UP TO. Not every item will be discounted that high or discounted at all.

8. Trying to make us join you in putting yourself down

No one looks like a super model. No one looks like Tyson Beckford and Naomi Campbell in the magazines. Even the real Tyson Beckford and Naomi Campbell don’t look like the Tyson and Naomi in the magazines. We are all beautiful in our own unique ways. There is nothing wrong with you. Please, don’t ask us to laugh along with you about your looks. Read Beyonce’s lips, hotness.

9. Trying on half the store and taking slim to nothing

We are thrilled that you love our line of clothes and you look great in them! But if you are going to try on more than ten items, please take at least a couple home with you. After all, we will have to put all the clothes away you decided against.

10. Lying

Yes, when you put several items on hold and promise us you will “come back for them in a hour,” we know just as well as you do that you won’t be back on 5th Avenue until Earth’s next celestial cycle. And you will probably still want that same handbag from four seasons ago. But we put your things on hold anyway. Just be real with us, it won’t hurt our feelings.

11. Thinking “Hi!” means “Give me your money and leave”

We get paid to greet you. Believe me, we don’t want to do it either. But we are expected to greet any customer the first time we see them. Don’t think that means we are trying to push clothes in your hand and money out of your Chanel handbag. And please, don’t shoo us away when we greet you by waving your hand and saying “I’m just looking.” That’s just sassy with a side of rude.

12. Insisting to try something on a mannequin and then not buying it

Dressing mannequins is an acquired art, a very difficult one. It can take several minutes, if not close to a half hour to put clothes on/pull them off a mannequin,especially if they are wearing skinny jeans. A lot of care goes into it and those stiff parts do not move. We understand if the last pair of something in your size is on the mannequin but if we pull it off, please take it home with you.

Let’s hear it