Retail Stories Archives - Page 42 of 63 - I Hate Working In Retail

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32 Fast Food Workers Reveal The Weirdest, Most Bizarre Stories They’ve Experienced While Working Drive-Thru

 

1. Couldn’t fit in the trunk

I was working at a Tim Hortons in Newfoundland when I was 15. A guy comes up to the speaker box, orders his coffee, and then I heard a weird noise that sounded like an elephant. He approaches the window, lo and behold there is a baby elephant in the back of his pickup. At the drive through. On an island in Canada. I was so confused, but just couldn’t bring up the elephant in the room – or pickup bed I guess.

2. Some people are morons

Working at McDonalds my sophomore year of high school, some lady went through the drive through at about 1 AM. Someone accidentally gave her a large diet coke instead of a large coke or something, so she threw the drink back through the window.

The drink landed quite heavily in the fry oil and splashed all over one of our co-workers. The girl drove away pretty fast, but the manager got her license plate number off the cameras. She was sued pretty badly.

3. Fat and angry

I was out in the car-park taking care of bins when a big bulky family car that had just been through the drive thru started circling and revving profusely. It caught my attention because it wasn’t like it was a sports car and I didn’t get why he was revving.

I soon found out it was because his kid had gotten the wrong topping on his ice cream, which he yelled through the window at me as he slammed into park right by me. His little bastard kid threw the ice cream at me, ruining my uniform. I was pretty pissed off so I picked it back up and threw it back at the car.

As it was sailing it’s creamy way toward the car again it suddenly dawned on me that this guy might get out and get me fired, so I froze. Luckily it landed on the roof cream side down AND the guy hadn’t noticed! So he drove off with his car wearing a little waffle hat.

I wish I’d been there to see his face later on. I quit about a week later when an angry customer smeared shit on the walls of the toilet.

4. Couple of real dicks

Maybe not the weirdest but the most dickish. I was hanging out after hours with a friend who was finishing up her shift. She was working drive-thru which was the only thing actually open. Some people came through and just asked for a couple cups of water. She says it costs 0.50 for that but they said they didn’t have any money. She said ah well, no big deal, come on through, and handed two cups of water to the person in the back seat (that’s how they pulled up.)

The guy yells “THANKS, BITCH” and throws the two cups of water on her, then drives away.

People are assholes.

5. Worldstar moments

It was about 9:30 at night so the store was nearly closed. A car pulled up and I greeted them several times with no response. I eventually waited for them to just decide they were ready (which happens often). The person behind them got impatient, and decided that honking wasn’t enough to make them move. I watched on the camera as this lady backed her car up and floored it to rear end the guy at the order box! Redneck and some lady immediately both get out of their cars and star hurling vulgar things at each other, meanwhile I’m laughing because I can hear the whole conversation. “Are you out of your F*&#$ mind lady?!” “Dumb@$$ redneck, this isn’t your squaller hole! You don’t have all night! Some of us want chicken!!” etc. My manager called the cops when they started pushing each other around. That was one of 4 wrecks I saw in our drive thru!

I’ve seen 4 people accidentally rear end someone while checking their bag, along with 2 flat tires, and 3 cars that died so we had to push them out of the way.

I’ve seen a girl getting fingered, and a guy getting a hand job, and a girl that had clearly just finished giving a blowjob.

I’ve seen a few dudes rolling joints.

I’ve seen a woman without any underwear on and her skirt up.

One time a lady came through and demanded I give her a shake that she didn’t get with her meal when she came through 11 months ago.

6. Compliments

Was working at McDonald’s presenting a few weeks ago and this lady comes to pick up her milkshake and she says to me “you’re doing a great job keep it up!” And proceeds to hand me a small fluffy toy snake. I closed the window and started laughing so hard.

7. Um…

Once, someone drove a truck to the window with a bed in the back. Another person got out, put the bed next to the window, and ordered their food, sitting on the bed to wait. The driver left. After receiving her food the bed woman carried the bed to a parking space, got in, and ate.

8. Dunkin’ Donuts

I once worked at a Dunkin Donuts for a few months, until I realized I hated that shitty job. Once we had a lovely woman pull up at the drive through twenty minutes before open. Naturally my co-worker and I ignored her while we hurried to set up because without the headset on, we had no idea she was even there. And there was no way I was putting that thing on a minute earlier that I had to.

Eventually she pulled up to the window with a pissed, evil-looking face. We gestured, “sorry” and that we weren’t open yet. Apparently she took it personally and started banging on the glass. When we opened the window to explain that we couldn’t serve her yet, she began cursing and squeezed her fat ass out of the car, and hung thru the window spewing off insults. We just stared in awe. I think we told her the cops were coming or something and she left. She was a crazy bitch.

9. This lady.

10. This happened

I worked in McDonalds before going to university to help pay for things, as my foster parents didn’t really have the means to help me much.

Anyway, there was this one man who came through the drive thru, late 30s, clearly a farmer from his vehicle and dog in the back. He was always nice enough, pretty quiet and I remember a couple of times that he tried to make nice small talk. When I worked either side of New Years, he asked me how things were and said I should be out having fun my age, asked if my christmas was good and all that. I remember thinking he always seemed real lonely or was sad when he drove through, and tried to carry conversation with me. I felt bad having to be quick with him and dart off, because he just seemed like he wanted someone to talk to.

Long story short, he drove through one day and asked if my last name was what he thought it was. After a sideways glance from my manager, I said it was. He looked real sad and took his hat off, said that he reckoned he was my dad. My bio-mother didn’t know who my dad was (she slept around as a teen, then got pregnant with me), so it was possible. My manager let me go on break.

So over my dinner he explains that he slept with my mother around the time that she got pregnant, he was only 16. He was really apologetic/kind of seemed ashamed, and said he said he was real sorry he didn’t seek me out, make sure I wasn’t his, that sort of thing. He was from a town about an hours drive away, so that was a part of it. And no one ever showed up to tell him he was a dad or anything. I told him I was happy with my life, gave him my number and told him to give me a bell sometime.

And yeah, that’s how I met my dad. My bio-dad, I should say. After a few years when I heard from my bio-mother again, she said that yeah, he was who she thought the father was. The other two guys she was sleeping with were black, and I ain’t. We went out for coffee 3 or 4 times, but we didn’t have much to talk about. He and I never really maintained contact, the last time we spoke he told me he’d been diagnosed with MS. He had a couple of sons but I was his only daughter and he said that he was grateful we had met. He’s still got my number somewhere.

11. That’s cool

So I’m working the drive through at Mickey D’s and this dude pulls up and orders an ice cream cone. I’m surprised because he’s actually nice to me and I suspect that he’s a bit high.

I leave to get the ice cream and when I get back to the window he’s holding up a 5 dollar bill.

“Duuude, look what I just found on the ground!”

“That’s awesome, wish I had that luck,” as my shoulders sag a little closer to the ground.

“Hey, how bout you take it. Ya probably work harder than I do anyway.”

I’m look to see if anyone is watching me, quickly snatch the cash and discretely put it in my pocket. I don’t think I was allowed to do that but fuck the system.

12. “Oh shit!”

I used to work at Tim Hortons and when I had to work on the window I would barely ever look out it if it was crazy busy. I’m 6’2″, for me to look out of the window I basically have to double over and look through it was so low. Anyways, one time I was really distracted and I took the persons money and didn’t look and handed the coffee out the window and let go when I felt a hand grab the cup. Immediately I heard “Oh shit!” so I look out the window and the guy has nubs for fingers and is waving his hand back and forth trying to get control of the cup enough to bring it in his car. I apologize profusely and he leaves after a couple minutes.

I had some old guy and his granddaughters around christmas singing christmas carols beside the speaker because we were lined up and really busy. He must not’ve known the speaker still picks up noise while the person is idling there, but it put a smile on all the worker’s faces.

13. What the hell was going on

I was working the drive thru at Starbucks and I got these trashy people (I could tell they were trashy because of how much extra Carmel Drizzle they wanted on their Vanilla Beans) and when the car pulls up the girl (in the passenger seat) is giving the guy (the driver) a hand job. His dick was just out in the open. They gave zero fucks. They were so casual about it like it was totally normal. To this day I don’t think I fully understand what happened that night. Thinking back I wish I said, when repeating their order back, “Two venti Vanilla Beans with extra Caramel Jizzle?”

14. Creepy exhibitionism

I work at Tim Hortons. One night, guy pulls up to the window. As I take his money, I think I saw his dick in his hand but I wasn’t completely sure since it was dark. I already took his $20 bill and I owe him his change so this time when I open the window I look down at his lap, sure enough he is masturbating. Except his penis wasn’t even erect, he was just jerking this small floppy penis. I froze for a few seconds, then gave him his change and said have a good night and shut the window.

15. What a shit job

When I was in high school I worked at a burger joint. At first they’d always put me on the fryer, and that fucking sucked. The guy who supervised me was Joe. Joe was pretty much a dick, and was always yelling at me for some shit. Way above and beyond new guy shit…. Anyways

One day they take me off that son of a bitch fryer, and put me on the window. Start my shift, and shit is going good. Then, near the end of the night this one ole boy rolls back around the drive through. I open the window, and he looks me dead in the eye, and says “my tots aren’t fucking done you stupid piece of shit!” AND THROWS THE BAG AT ME. Guess who’s on the fryer? THAT PIECE OF SHIT JOE. So, we cooked the guy some more tots and Joe somehow blamed that shit on me. I worked there like 5 months. Did not have much fun. Good shakes though.

16. Creepy?

I was working the drive through teller window at the bank one day. Then a guy pulls up with a fully clothed blow up doll in the passenger seat. “She” was all buckled up and everything. I looked at “her”, and then at him, and he creepily said “It’s so I can use the carpool lanes.”

17. For shits n’ giggles

I’ve had multiple people drive through it in reverse. Kind of impressive honestly.

18. He was sure as hell mad

I had an experience where a drive-thru worker was being weird? Does that count?

One early Saturday morning in high school, my buddy and I were blazing really hard. We had started smoking right after school got out around 2:30p on Friday, and were rolling all the way until around 2a Saturday morning. We were gonzo as shit — and we were doing this marathon thing trying to block the munchies. Every time one of got an urge to eat, we would force ourselves to take another rip to tide it off. Long story short: we were toasted.

We ended up caving around 2a and driving (I know, dumb to drive) to the nearest Burger King. We go through the drive-thru, it’s totally dead, not a soul or car in the area, and we order a shit-ton of food. We pull up to the cashier window, and the cashier is this older 50ish year old dude who seemed to the only one in the entire restaurant.

He looks right at us, and asks with total sincerity, “you kids got herb?”

My friend and I both bust out laughing, vehemently denying it, naturally. But the man persisted and asked three more times — eventually we caved and said yeah, we did. He then propositioned us with as much free food as we wanted and could eat that morning if we split a blunt with him in the back.

We naturally fucking agreed.

We met him around back near the dumpsters, rolled a paper, and blazed the shit out of the back of the BK. We finish the blunt, he proposes we roll another. We decline. He gets mad. Starts charging at my buddy, trying to take the rest of the weed stash. I help him fight this rouge BK worker off, and the guy is absolutely irate. Yelling and shit, freaking the fuck out.

We sprint back to the car, and peel the fuck out. We looked back and the dude was chasing us down the road on foot. Wild.

19. I call bullshit on this one

A bunch of stoners came through the drive through and only managed to order exactly $4.20 worth of food, paid with a $20, and left without their change.

Every aspect of the interaction blew my mind.

20. Hero…in?

Had a man and woman come thru and order. They get to the window and he falls asleep in the 60 seconds he is sitting there. The lady wakes him up and he pays. Then before we could hand his food out to him we noticed his truck started to roll. I get to the window in time to see the truck scraping the building. He got onto the highway woke up and floored it. He came back 30 minutes later and ordered something completely different. He didn’t know that he had been by KFC already. Manager called cops and we kept him in the drive thru until they got there.

21. Nudist

I worked at McDonalds when I was 16. We had a guy that would drive through the drive thru completely naked.

22. Welp.

Worked at a Starbucks through high school and part of university. We were supposed to chat up the patrons in the drive thru to make their wait a little more bearable.

Anyway, couple comes through, and they ask me, “If you were a dildo, what colour would you be?”

Green, duh.

And then there was this one time, Another couple came through in a big pickup truck. I ask how their day has been, and the female responds with “I was just released from the hospital.”

I say, “Good to hear you are all better!” and she then proceeds to tell me she was in a car accident and is paralyzed from the waist down. My jaw hits the floor and I am speechless. I hand them their drinks, wish them off, and watch as the wheelchair speeds off in the back of the truck. I’ll never forget that encounter. That made me feel like a piece of shit.

23. Fuck Yu-gi and his goddamn blue-eyes white dragon

I worked at McDonalds for almost two years. The strangest incident would have to be the kid who attempted to pay me in pokemon cards by explaining how much each was worth on eBay. When I explained to him that his cards could not be used as currency he became upset, accused me of being a “dirty Yu-Gi-oh fan” and drove off, leaving me confused with both his cards and his food.

24. Uhh…

25. Inspiring!

I had dude driving without arms come through my line at Taco Bell, driving a modified Gran Prix with his feet. It appeared to be a defect he was born with, he was even able to count out change and hand it to me with his toes!! I was 18 at the time, and it taught me that the only limits we have are the ones we place on ourselves. Inspiring.

26. I guess ordering diet coke after ordering three big macs is a big deal

Good god I only worked at McDonalds for 3 months.

Car with 4 ghetto black guys receive their massive order of $1 burgers. Before they drive off they say “Ey, you gotta light?” “Yeaaaa” Give them my lighter. They literally light up a blunt in the drive thru.

Valentines Day. Who brings their date to Mcdonalds? Well mostly high-schoolers, it was also next to a movie theater so whatever. Then, this 50 year old woman comes in by herself. Orders 2 meals while repeatedly mentioning that her husband will be here any minute. He never came, I’m sure he never existed. Sad.

Seeing homeless people come out from the forest drunk, pay for a few burgers in dimes and nickels, stumble back to the forest.

Morning, car full of construction workers in a van, getting food before their shift. Passing around a blunt. Personally I find nothing wrong with weed, but seriously.

Nice quiet, polite kid came about 3 times a week. Always brought his massive German Shepherd in the back. I sure he got some burgers. :)

Got screamed at by an old black guy because I didn’t give him Splenda on the side. SCREAMED at.

15 teenagers in the dining area being rowdy, whatever, but they’re cursing like mechanics and there’s quite a few little kids in the place. Our cherry shift manager asks politely to stop, which somehow makes her a “stupid ugly bitch.”

Woman’s food is going to take longer than expected. To keep up with times we ask her to pull in a spot. I don’t remember what she said, basically fuck fuck shit, I ain’t fucking moving.

Another older woman screaming at me because her coke wasn’t a dollar (that was the deal back then, but not when its apart of a meal). Explain this, but shes still flapping around yelling and screaming. I wasn’t even mad, poker face asked her “Why are you seriously yelling at me over 79¢?” Gives me the nastiest smile “I’d like to see your manager” They fucking gave it to her.

The stereotype of getting a diet coke with a huge meal is true. Best was when this rude, 30 year old, troll of a man came in. Large Big Mac with a diet coke. Sure that’ll stop the onset of Type 2 Diabetes. Gets another Big Mac with it. Yes I watched him eat it and yes he ate it all.

I can deal with trailer trash and ghetto people, rich suburb moms coming for Frappes were the most condescending and rude people I ever dealt with. Some would seriously speak to me like I’m mentally challenged.

Every day I would come home with at least one story like that. I mean every single day. And this was the ‘nicest’ McDonald’s in the city. I have more stories but I leave it with these three things:

Only 30% of people would say thank you. That’s unbelievable to me.

I have so much patience for fast food workers and if I need money that bad again I’ll go back. But MY GOD, there is nothing more demoralizing coming home from orientation trying on your uniform. “Yep, I’m really doing this, how the hell did I get here”

I’ve worked a few jobs and have always been a top employee. I was terrible at McDonalds, seriously one of the worst workers. I got better, but it gave me an attitude check. So much harder than people make fun of it for.

Diet Coke ain’t no joke.

27. Pickles

A couple years ago, I worked at a drive thru and this guy came around to pay. When he got there, he asked “hey, did I say I wanted extra pickles on that? Because I want extra pickles on that.” I informed him that his burger was already made and ready to go, but offered to have a new one fixed up with a satisfactory amount of pickles. the man paused, then had a look of realization. He looked up and said “Don’t worry about it! Now that I think about it, I think I might have some extra ones right here.” this valued customer then proceeded to open up his glove compartment and pull out a giant jar of sliced pickles. It was weird.

28. This conversation

I was once working drive – thru orders and this lady came up the speaker, I greeted her and then told her to order whenever she was ready. She said that she wasn’t going to order anything and that she just needed someone to talk to. The customer is always right so I talked with her about how my day was going and then she told me she has herpes. I was dumbstruck, this lady probably just found out she had herpes and the only one she could talk to was the drive-thru guy? I was floored and talked to her for a few minutes and then she said that she had better go unlike the herpes she had. Never saw her face or even her car. I kinda wish I had her come to my window.

29. You dumbass

Well this isn’t a DT window story, but its funny and involves a drive thru. I was working as a manager for Tim Hortons in Ontario. And I was walking through the parking lot and checking to make sure everything was up to standard. A lady that was stopped in the drive thru queue line called me over. And proceeded to tear me a new one, that she has been waiting here for 10 minutes in front of the speaker. And that this was the worst service she has ever seen etc. After her rant I politely told her that this was a garbage can and that the speaker box was just up a bit more.

30. This guy’s seen it all

I have a few favorites, both from Long John Silver’s. The first one was when someone came to the drive-thru, clearly high, and asked for a Big Mac. I told him this is Long John Silver’s and we don’t serve burgers at all. I could hear him and his friend discuss for a second, then he said, “Oh, sorry, I guess make it a Whopper, then.” Goddamn it. It took him some convincing to get him to understand, and in the end he left without getting anything.

Another time, this dude flipped the fuck out because he had to wait too long for his chicken. He showed up about ten minutes before close and the three cars in front of him had also ordered family meals (huge orders of chicken and/or fish). Two of our four fryers were already shut down because it was so close to closing time, so we had to cook each car’s order individually since we can only cook 20-25 pieces at a time.

Once he finally pulled up to the window, he was screaming and cursing for taking so long. I handed him his change and he threw it into his car full force, still screaming about how we were making him late for something drastically important or something. I genuinely don’t think I’ve ever seen someone that angry before or since. I handed him his food and drink and asked if he wanted any sauce, and he screamed the sauces he wanted. Since he was in a hurry, I just handed him the sauce directly and he took the handful from my hand and immediately threw it back at me and peeled out. The thing is, the drive thru was just a lined area in the parking lot, so he really could have left anytime before he paid if he was in such a goddamned hurry.

The last great story was when some ginormous woman came through and ordered four large family meals. And of course an extra large diet Coke, because that makes it okay to eat all that deep fried shit. So I was a bit surprised that this woman was by herself in her car ordering so much food. She was really, really huge, so I wasn’t totally shocked, but it still seemed like a lot.

So she pulls up, and the car is just full of trash and shit. This was before Hoarders, so I had no idea that was a thing, but looking back, she was definitely a hoarder. There were food wrappers piled deep in the back seat, cigarettes and ash overflowing from the ashtray, and a fucking stained, nautically-themed beanbag chair in the passenger seat. So after she paid, I handed her the food and the drink, and out of nowhere, an arm appears from the beanbag chair and grabs the drink. I leaned down to get a better look, and sure enough, it was actually just a dude even larger than the driver. It was genuinely shocking that the two of them fit into the same car with the doors closed.

I’m not one to mock fat people to be a dick, but this was just pure shock at the spectacle of exactly how huge these people were. It was like the kind of people who would be on an A&E special. It was that excessive.

31. There are good people after all

We had Elvis as a regular. Well, technically an Elvis impersonator, but still. He just came through the drive through in the morning about once a week and ordered an iced coffee. I noticed he happened to look sorta like Elvis, but didn’t say anything until one time he paid with a credit card, and I saw the name Elvis on there. I asked him, and apparently he had had his name legally changed to Elvis. Even had it on his driver’s license.

And then there was Batman. I shit you not, he had the outfit, a black corvette (with a strobe light on top) and BATMAN as the license plate number! Know what he ordered? A single bottle of water. Then he gave me a $20 and said to use the change to pay for whoever was behind him. He came through multiple times, and once had a girl dressed as Catwoman (comic book Catwoman, not movie Catwoman, thank god) in the passenger seat. He always did the same thing. Once that $20 managed to cover four other cars’ worth of food, and I got to tell them all that their order had been paid for by Batman. Fun times. And damn his car was cool.

32. Revenge is sweet

Worked at Popeyes while in high school. With 10 minutes till closing one Friday night a customer pulled up and ordered a rather large amount of chicken and sides.

In case you are wondering they try to time these things out based on previous sales so we: a) Did not have enough chicken to fill the order b) Did not have enough side items to fill the order

So I tell the guy it will be almost 20 minutes to get his order together because we would have to drop chicken in the fryer. Dude says that’s cool and pulls around after I give him the total. I am not happy about the event since the cook has left for the night so I have fry the chicken, re clean the frying station, open new side items bags/ingredients, and update the cooks inventory sheet (since he already left). Plus I will be late, but what ever it’s a job.

Dude comes to the drive through window, I slide the widow back, and I tell him his total. Guy never turns his head towards me keeps his eyes straight ahead and proceeds to throw a wad of crumpled up cash and coins at my face. The snowball of dirty change hits me straight in the face when I hear him say “catch”. I stand there stunned while the currency falls to the floor and watch in disbelief as he (still looking straight ahead out his windshield) pulls the switch to roll up his window. Guy never looks at me.

Since it was almost closing time I already counted my drawer and now I am going to have to bend over pick up the bills and coins to insure my register amount is correct. Well some of the dimes, nickels, and quarters rolled underneath the tables which sucked. Why? Because the floors still had the cleaning solvent put down since everyone was in cleanup mode when this happened.

So I’m a senior in high school, working Friday night, got hit in the face with balls of coins and cash, and now my pant knees are going to be wet the whole way home since this douche decided to just fling money at me.

20 minutes go by and I start to bag his order. I put the chicken box in, I put the mash potato, dirty rice, and mac and cheese containers in, I pull back the sealing lids on top of the side items just slightly, and I approach the drive-thru window.

Now the guy rolls his window down when I slide back the drive-thru window and looks at me with a smile on his face because he is about to get his order. I sling the bag of fried chicken and side items as hard as could out my window, through his window, and the bag explodes against his passenger side window. Mashed potatoes, dirty rice, and mac and cheese are everywhere. I yelled “catch” when I did it.

Sourced from thoughtcatalog.com

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By

33 Things Only People Who Have Worked In Clothes Shops Will Understand

 

1. Getting annoyed when your friends make weekend plans and you have to turn them down. Again.

Walt Disney Pictures / meangirlgifs.tumblr.com

“No, I can’t get off early.”

2. Being asked whether something is on sale when it obviously isn’t.

“Oh it doesn’t say it’s on sale? Well it’s probably not on sale then.”

3. When customers pick something up and don’t put it back in the same place.

How very CONSIDERATE of you.

4. The importance of making sure every hanger is facing the same way.

And that every row of hangers is evenly spaced.

5. The very specific pain you can only understand if you’ve been on your feet for more than 8 hours straight.

Company Pictures / degrassi.wikia.com

6. When you’re asked to explain the returns policy and you’re like, “SURE I’D LOVE TO READ YOUR RECEIPT TO YOU.”

Chuck Lorre Productions / theberry.com

Just don’t buy things you don’t want, OK?

7. The art of using a folding board correctly.

Chuck Lorre Productions / w11.zetaboards.com

And then lining up every shirt perfectly.

8. When a customer tells you to enjoy your weekend, even though you’re very obviously working instead of enjoying.

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9. When a customer says, “You must be exhausted!” and you’re like, “YEAH, NO SHIT.”

10. When a customer comes out of a changing room and you have to tell them they look great even when they don’t.

Um, maybe if it were opposites day.

11. Being handed a shirt that someone has just tried on and left makeup all over.

12. Being beckoned over to a customer because they literally cannot be bothered to walk three steps toward you.

“Sure I’ll come, it’s not like I have other things to do or anything.”

13. Hating Christmas by Dec. 1 because you’ve been surrounded by decorations for MONTHS.

If you see one more set of flashing lights…

14. Not to mention never wanting to hear Christmas music ever again.

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15. And then being asked to wrap all your family’s Christmas presents because, you know, you’re so good at it.

Damn you, gift wrap.

16. Of course, the only thing worse than Christmas is January sales.

17. When people take 1,000 items into a changing room and leave 999 of them scrunched up in a pile on the floor.

18. The moment you’re about to take a break and suddenly the shop is full again.

“JUST LET ME EAT.”

19. When all you want to do is sleep but all you’re allowed to do is greet.

“Hey! Welcome! Have a great day!” Bleurghhhhhh.

20. The intense fury that builds up inside you as a customer pays exclusively in coins.

21. Especially if they put the coins on the table instead of in your outreached palm.

“I’m not diseased. You can touch my hand.”

22. When an item doesn’t scan and the customer jokes that it must be free.

“What an original joke. I have certainly never heard that one before. LOLOLOLOLOLOLOL.”

23. Being stuck in an empty shop and getting so bored you take a stock check.

Company Pictures / groupthink.jezebel.com

Woooohoooo! I love my inventory!

24. Finishing your shift at 6 p.m. and having to cash up instead of drinking with your friends.

Done and Done Productions / earlymama.com

25. And then realising the tills don’t balance.

“So I’ll be here for at least another 75 hours then.”

26. Feeling close to tears every time you’re asked to put together a window display.

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27. People who are “just looking”.

28. People who are “just looking” two minutes before the shop closes.

“No, honestly. Take your time. It’s not like your casual browsing is affecting my evening plans. OH YEAH IT IS.”

29. When someone asks you to get your manager and you’re like, “Oh sure, I’d love to get my manager.”

“Because I’m obviously not capable of dealing with your very difficult problem myself.”

30. When a customer tries to use a discount voucher that expired three years ago.

“Can you READ?”

31. Or worse, when a customer tries to return something that has very clearly been worn.

32. That awkward moment when you don’t know whether the card machine’s being glitchy or the customer just doesn’t have enough money.

“I’M SORRY, I DON’T ENJOY THIS ANY MORE THAN YOU DO.”

33. FINALLY being given a weekend off, and being called at the last minute to cover someone else’s shift.

Company Pictures / 4shared.com

Sourced from buzzfeed.com

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By

18 Irritating People All Retail Workers Meet

tumblr.com

tumblr.com

If the world was a just place, everyone would have to work in customer service at least once in their life. Because then they would know what it felt like to work in an utterly thankless job, and maybe their experience would change their attitude towards retail and customer service employees. Every job has its downsides, and it’s not like people who work retail have to worry about getting the black lung from working down in the mines all day. But you have to admit, anyone who works in customer service has to deal with more than their share of idiotic human beings. As a wise man once said, this job would be great if it weren’t for the people.

Despite the fact that humans are unique little snowflakes, as soon as they head out into the world to go shopping, they quickly fall into neat little subcategories. There are pleasant shoppers, to be sure — people who are courteous and prompt, who clean up after themselves and make an effort not to make the lives of the workers any harder. But then there are also species upon species of terrible customers who upset the delicate relationship that exists between shopper and retailer.

 

18. The One Who Doesn’t Own a Watch

now-here-this.timeout.com

now-here-this.timeout.com

They stroll leisurely into your store about ten minutes before closing, and browse as though they haven’t got a care in the world. What they don’t seem to realize is that you don’t get to magically leave as soon as the store closes. If you close at 9, you’ll probably be there for at least an hour later. So every minute past closing they spend in the store, that’s one more minute you’re not in bed eating ice cream and watching House of Cards.

 

17. The Slob

realitynation.com

realitynation.com

The polite version of The Slob brings the remnants of their lunch into the store and asks if you can throw it out in your garbage can. Fair enough. The impolite version instead designs a cunning treasure hunt, where as you straighten the store for closing you discover a half empty cup of lemonade in one corner, and a Big Mac container hidden among the shoes.

16.The Busy Mom

wifflegif.com

wifflegif.com

This mom has a million things on her mind, she doesn’t have time to monitor her children while they’re in your store. Are you kidding? That’s your job, peasant. Meanwhile, while Mom blisses out shopping, her children run amok creating the kind of messes that will take you the rest of the night to clean up.

We’re talking Cheerios on the floor, sticky hands on the merchandise, the whole nine yards. She’ll probably then complain loudly that your store doesn’t have a bathroom for her precious little Neveah, who has been sucking down a Coke/spilling it on the floor the whole time.

 

15. The Phantom Caller

imgarcade.com

imgarcade.com

You haven’t ever actually met this person but you hate them a little bit already. They call up wanting to know a specific detail about a product, but because you’re, you know, running a store, you have to put them on hold. You take care of the people in line, get the information for the person, and get back on the line with them. But they are very displeased that you made them wait. “How dare you? I am a doctor, my time is valuable!” (Sadly, that is a direct quote.)

 

14. The Sneeringly Pretentious One

conservatives4palin.com

conservatives4palin.com

This person is incredibly proud of the fact that they don’t work retail, and considers everyone who does uneducated, untouchable serfs. They think they don’t need to clean up after themselves because after all, that’s what you’re paid to do, and if you didn’t want to do that, you should have gone to college.

You consider telling them that you actually do have a college degree, it’s just that you’re really attached to food and shelter and it turns out you need money for those things.

13. The One Who Is Positive You Have More In The Back

falfindshappiness.blogspot.com

falfindshappiness.blogspot.com

You don’t. You know this because you’ve been going into the back room several times over the past few hours, under the guise of checking stock, but really just taking a moment to collect yourself so that you avoid breaking something expensive in a fit of rage.

So yes, you have the back room’s stock memorized. Unless they’re looking for a bathroom with several health code violations or a broken mop, whatever this person wants is most definitely not back there.

12. The Tornado

www.thekitchn.com

www.thekitchn.com

These people are clearly under the impression that elves clean the store while it’s closed. They pick up things and put them down somewhere else. They purposefully go through racks of clothes and put half the smalls in the larges and half the mediums on the clearance rack. They leave the dressing rooms in such a state that you can only assume they fought off a large bull whilst trying on skinny jeans.

 

11. The One With All The Dad Jokes

wifflegif.com

wifflegif.com

The really sad part is that they think you haven’t heard these ones before. Oh, the scanner isn’t working? “I guess it’s free!” Yes, because that’s how a free market economy works. Also, no, you are not the first person to tell that joke today. But hey, you have your dad jokes, we have an occasionally debilitating sense of sarcasm, so it all evens out in the end.

 

10. The One Who Thinks This Is A Turkish Bazaar

menknowpause.fooyoh.com

menknowpause.fooyoh.com

This is not a flea market, or Chinatown, or a crowded street market in the Middle East. What possesses people to think that they can come into corporate America and start haggling? You, as a minimum wage worker, are not in a position to barter with this joker as they try to trade you twelve dollars and a half-eaten bag of Skittles in exchange for your products. It’s like…have you been in a store before?

 

9. The Clueless Shopper

glee.wikia.com

glee.wikia.com

They’re shopping for someone else, and you can only assume this person told them what they wanted through Morse Code. They’re looking for something that’s a light color, with a neckline, and some kind of stuff on the sleeves. Do you have that? Unfortunately, they’re usually not willing to explore, instead depending on you to help them find the illusive item, as they stare wide-eyed as though they’ve never been in a store before.

8. The Con Artist

themuse.com

themuse.com

Look, you and this con artist both know that the item they’re trying to return was absolutely not purchased at your store. You know because you’ve been working there for four years and to the best of your knowledge, Ann Taylor Loft has never sold Scooby Doo purses. But they’re still going to try it, because there’s nothing to lose. Except your valuable time, of course.

 

7. The Cell Phone Addict

yougottaburythat.tumblr.com

yougottaburythat.tumblr.com

You know how some people taught their children that it was rude to talk on a cell phone while checking out at a store unless it was an absolute life and death emergency? Well, some people didn’t, and the result is the cell phone addict. Their conversation is so important that it can’t be halted, not even to exchange paltry pleasantries with the cashier.

What’s really irritating about these encounters is that it makes you into the intruder, and you feel almost like you’re interrupting if, God forbid, you have to ask them a question

6. The Princess

glee.wikia.com

glee.wikia.com

The world revolves around this person (the name is the Princess, but it could just as easily be a guy). They don’t understand why you can’t make an exception for them in regards to store policy – after all, they’re just one teeny tiny person, where’s the harm in that?

You try to explain that it’s not that simple, your boss checks on those things, or the computer system literally won’t let you do what they’re asking for, or that if you do it for them, you have to do it for everyone. It doesn’t work.

 

5. The One With The Throbbing Vein In His Forehead

replygif.net

replygif.net

This man is irate. Something horrible has gone wrong, and you hope to God it wasn’t your fault. Unfortunately, he’s usually very perturbed about something that is completely out of your control. “What??  You mean I only have 30 days to return this?? And I need a receipt?! You don’t understand, I am a very important customer! I want to speak to your manager!”

This probably isn’t a good time to tell him that you are the manager.

 

4. The Coupon Ninja

vajiggle.tumblr.com

vajiggle.tumblr.com

On the one hand, you have to appreciate the time and effort that went into their voracious couponing. They’ve got every offer your store has ever made, including the online codes pulled up and ready to go on their phone. The only problem? Entering in all these codes and scanning the coupons and checking to make sure they’re all still valid takes time.

Woe betide you if you work at a store that makes you manually enter in the discount. The Coupon Ninja may have saved a bundle, but the twelve people in line behind her are less enthused.

3. Complicated Question Karen

says.com

says.com

Karen has a knack for asking the type of questions that probably weren’t even covered in your policy manual, and definitely not in your training sessions. She’s a lawyer in her non-shopping life, and she’s not above trying to exploit the loopholes in your store’s corporate policy. Inevitably, her questions will have to go up the chain of command, first to your disgruntled manager, who will spend the better part of his or her afternoon on hold with the corporate office to seek clarification. Karen is content to wait.

 

2. The Pack Of Teenagers

www.lifeinprogress.ca

www.lifeinprogress.ca

Don’t they have anywhere else to go? They spend a few hours milling about, making you have to keep a steady eye on them to make sure they’re not shoplifting. Their constant giggling makes you feel like you’re back in high school, and you can’t help but think that they’re laughing at you. The bottom line is, if you’re going to spend two hours in a store, you should at least buy something. Restaurants don’t put up with those kind of shenanigans.

 

1. The One Who Cuts You Off When You Greet Them

s1226.photobucket.com

s1226.photobucket.com

There is a special circle in hell reserved for this people. You start to say, “Hi, can I –”, but before you can get it all the way out, they wave you off dismissively, saying, “Just looking.” As if they don’t realize (which they probably don’t), that you could get in trouble for not greeting customers in the proper way. You don’t like it any more than they do. They should have the decency to let you get through your spiel so that you can both get on with your lives.

Sourced from whatculture.com

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