View this image ›

2. Heaslip’s line manager accidentally forwarded his holiday request to 3,500 staff members working at Arcadia, the retail group that owns fashion chains Topshop, BHS, and Dorothy Perkins.

3. And work for the day quickly ground to a halt as the #GiveGregTheHoliday hashtag was born.

6. The joke started off as an in-joke among Arcadia employees.

10. It apparently even broke someone’s computer.

11. The joke soon spread across the internet.

13. Brands got involved.

15. Things escalated pretty quickly…

16. And then BOOM — TrekAmerica really stepped it up and offered him a free trip to Las Vegas!

17. And everyone pretty much lost their minds.

20. And brands kept on jumping on the bandwagon.

24. Arcadia later revealed Heaslip’s holiday request had been OK’d before all the fun.

“The holiday request had actually already been approved on the system and Greg will get his holiday,” a spokesperson said.

25. Some were a little upset though.

26. But the real winner was Greg. True fame achieved.

27. UPDATE: Greg has now been located.

He had no idea he’d gone viral on the internet, and he’s donated all his free stuff to the Stephen Sutton cancer charity. He’s still taking his two days off, though – he’s taking his wife and two daughters to Chessington World of Adventures

For customers, this is annoying and overbearing. Depending on who you do it to, it could unintentionally come across as racist, ageist, or something equally politically incorrect. Instead, try and guess where the customer is headed, and attempt to remain one step ahead of them at all times. Try looking repeatedly over your shoulder with a very judgmental stare, and, if they wind up in the same spot as you, say something like, “Fancy meeting you here…” in a really rude tone of voice. Serves them right — what, they think they’re too good to be followed?

2. Don’t Let Your Friends Come Into the Store to Visit You

Doing this while you’re on the clock is inexcusable: you should be leaving the store to visit them.

3. Whenever a Customer Asks You Something, Consult the Back Room

As a retail worker, you should always maintain an air of professionalism and a courteous, inviting smile; this ensures that customers will feel comfortable asking you for assistance. Of course, helping customers is probably just about the last thing you want to do, especially since the majority of them have never become acquainted with phrases like, “please” or “thank you,” and have certainly never taken the time to consider the fact that they may actually be a total assclown.

However, a customer’s question provides you with the valuable opportunity to drop whatever you are doing and answer, “Hmm… let me check the back room” or “Let me ask my manager.” Seriously, would you rather be stocking American Idol refrigerator magnets or aimlessly wandering around your store’s customer-free back room? And it doesn’t matter if the customer asks you something you already know the answer to, like “Where’s the bathroom?” or “What time is it?” Regardless of whatever their half-way intelligible question is, it provides you with an opportunity for sweet, sweet momentary escape.

4. Don’t Work in a Store that Plays a Limited Music Playlist

This is more of a warning than a tip: If you work in a store that uses a playlist of fewer than 100 songs for in-store music, you will probably show up for work one day wearing a trench coat and wielding an axe while screaming the lyrics to a Michelle Branch or Maroon 5 song.

5. Make Up Your Own Holidays

Unfortunately, working in retail often means working on holidays. Missing out on these traditions can cause anxiety, depression, and a ton of guilt from your family. What I recommend to remedy this is inventing your own holidays to make up for the ones you’re stuck working on. While you won’t get the sense of unity and familiarity that traditional holidays bring, you get the added bonus of celebrating things you actually care about on your own schedule. For instance, while your friends are stuck working on September 18th, you can be chillaxin’ at home, celebrating the anniversary of Britney Spears and Kevin Federline’s tragically brief marriage!

Some other holidays I’ve invented include the upcoming power duo of Arbor Day Eve (April 26th) and Hitler’s Death Day (April 30th), as well as The WNBA All-Star Game, Cockblock a Stranger Day, and National Weird Al Appreciation Day. You will definitely be able to take these days off because you’ll be the only one asking for them. Well, also because no one will want to celebrate them with you.

6. Take Advantage of Time Away From Your Manager

Hopefully you’ll have the privilege of working for a trusting manager who allows you to handle duties like opening and closing the store when he’s not around, or working on his usual days off or vacation days. Working without a manager around to meddle in your affairs is the prime benefit of being in the retail field. Just think, you’re your own boss — you run the store… except you could care less whether anything gets sold or not. You need to take advantage of this time to do whatever the hell you want, from blasting Slayer over the loudspeakers to scare away customers to ripping bong hits in the back room. After all, this is your time to shine.

7. Learn Where Everything in Your Store is

This will provide you with grim satisfaction when you have dialogues like the following:

Customer: Yeah, where’s your selection of domestic beers? You: This is a pet store, you incomparable moron. Customer (staring at you blankly): … You: Let me check the back room.

8. Encourage Shoplifting

In fact, you should remove the anti-theft tags from as many items as possible and leave them lying around the exits of your store. Just think: every time someone shoplifts, it’s like they’re punching your boss directly in the balls (and/or ovaries).

9. Lie Blatantly About Your Products

Customers love to ask esoteric questions about your store’s products, like “Are these Cheerios organic?” or “What country were these shoelaces manufactured in?” If you work for a store that takes pride in the knowledge of its staff, that’s great. But most consumers are under the mistaken assumption that places like T.J. Maxx, Walmart, and Discount Bob’s 98¢ Store provide extensive product information training. They might be surprised to discover that the training usually consists of, “There’s the bathroom. Do you know how to use a punch clock?”

Use these opportunities to feed the creative impulses that so often go unused in the retail field. Compensate for the fact that you have literally the exact same level of knowledge regarding your products as a random person off the street by inventing impressive facts and thrilling back-stories.

“Well sir, these jean shorts are actually made entirely from high-quality denim cultivated from the renowned Jort Farms of the Pacific Islands.”

“Yes, ma’am I do recommend those Q-tips — they’re made from real ostrich bones.”

10. The Customer is Always Right

Just kidding, I wanted to make sure you were still paying attention.

11. ABC – Always Be Closing

I’m not sure what this means, but Alec Baldwin says it like thirty times in Glengarry Glen Ross, which is a movie about salesmen and salesmanship. I usually just repeat it incessantly to customers with a quizzical look on my face. “Always be closing? Always… be… closing?” Sometimes I even drool. Eventually, they take the hint and leave me alone.

12. Whenever Possible, Wear a Name Tag With Someone Else’s Name On It

Well, duh

Sourced from thoughtcatalog

Shutterstock

1. Mystery shoppers give retail workers trust issues for life. Are you undercover? Is this a test? Are you wearing a wire? Blink two times if you’re wearing a wire. Oh, God, I don’t even know what’s real anymore!

2. The only thing more proficient at making gigantic messes than an unsupervised kid is said child’s careless parents. At least toddlers have small hands and undeveloped brains — these grown, full-sized humans are capable of misplacing, unfolding and tossing aside at indefensible rates.

3. Contrary to popular belief, when customers request something and the employee tells them it’s not in stock without walking to the back, that doesn’t mean they don’t care. It’s just that the back room is less like Willy Wonka’s factory and more like a janitor’s closet.

4. Sometimes you’ll play along, heading to the back and pretending to check on a product that you know isn’t there to make the customer feel better, using that five minutes as a bonus break to rummage through social media on your phone.

5. You repeat so many phone greetings, generic customer service lines and corny salutations that they’re embedded in your brain for life.

6. No good deed goes unpunished. You help the blatantly clueless customer with ten minutes left in your shift and they’ll have endless questions and requests that keep you 20+ minutes after. More often than not it seems to work out this way when you make an effort to be helpful and like, actually do what you’re being paid for.

7. Stealth texting is a craft and you will master it until eventually you’re a retail texting ninja who holds flawless, typo-free conversations with friends throughout shifts.

8. Your ability to withstand rejection is incredible because most of the time, pitching upsells or offering people special cards that’ll save them 10% on this purchase results in a quick, resounding “no,” yet there you are, asking another uninterested customer 15 seconds later.

9. There are songs that others enjoy but you’ll hate for life because they’ve been playing on a loop every shift and are basically the soundtrack to your misery. Not to mention the fact that every December, thousands of retailers permanently ruin Christmas music for their employees.

10, Many nightmare customers simply won’t ever understand how horrible they are. The only medicine for treating rude, impatient, unpleasant shoppers would be to force everybody to work retail for at least a year so they can experience the struggle in every season. Back to school retail is intense, but nothing compared to the cutthroat holidays. It’s a lot easier to be understanding and easygoing with employees when you’ve been on the other side of the spectrum.

11. You’ve got to have some guts to attempt stealing because good Lord, there are cameras everywhere. And it’s not just like 240p footage being taken; I’m talking high definition, capable of reading the tiny label on your shirt type recordings. Even if you get out with some goods, there’s a high chance your picture will be pasted for employees to lookout for. You’d never try to stop these people yourself because:

1. People stealing things tend to be desperate/dumb/unstable — all scary traits.
2. You don’t get paid nearly enough to play security guard with someone else’s money.

12. Wearing a nametag makes people think you have way more power than you do. Just because I fold the jeans doesn’t mean I can give them to you 75% off. Nothing more frustrating than people asking for hookups that you yourself don’t even get as an employee.

13. You won’t get paid like the CEO, but you will take complaints and verbal abuse for him/her. People will become hostile with you in regards to issues you have no hand in establishing or eliminating. Those responsible in corporate are probably on a retreat, golfing or laying in the sand listening to crashing waves while the common employee folds, lifts, hangs and cleans up to the sweet sounds of criticism and Bitter Sweet Symphony by The Verve for the fourth time today.

14. There’s a uniquely disrespectful, helpless feeling that is only experienced when a customer comes in a few minutes before closing and shops leisurely as if your personal time is worthless and you don’t mind staying late. They don’t realize you can’t even begin several closing duties until they’re done. Or even worse they know it but simply don’t care.

15, People will look down on you because of your job and they may not directly say it, but you can always identify when it’s happening.

16. Black Friday isn’t some fun, festive day to save a few bucks on a TV, it’s more of a showcasing of how terrible some humans can be and how low many will stoop for worldly objects.

17. It’s essentially impossible to be spontaneous or make plans during the months of November & December because your employer wants your existence to revolve around pushing sales and being available at all hours. A social life is non-existent during the holidays.

Sourced from thoughtcatalog.com