15 things you wish you were brave enough to say at work
Here’s how work works: someone pays you to do stuff, you do the stuff and you get paid. But this is only half the story, you’re also being paid not to do stuff. You’re paid not to turn up looking like a scruff, you’re paid not to give away the company secrets and you’re paid not to speak your mind. This, as you will know, is sometimes easier said than done.
There are times when we would just love to say what we really think. If only we had the gall to follow through with it… poohead. THERE, I SAID IT.
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Oh I don’t actually work here
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Get the manager? I AM the manager
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Nothing is for sale. This isn’t a shop. You’re imagining this
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I KNOW HOW TO PICK UP A BOX
And why do I have to wear my gym clothes?
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I’ll check if it’s in stock but really I’m just going to play on my phone in the warehouse for a few minutes
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Sorry, I’m too tired to do anything today, come back tomorrow
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I’m not coming in tomorrow and I’m not explaining why
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You ain’t the boss of me!
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I can see your point, that’s how I know it’s stupid
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Has it occurred to anyone else that all of this is entirely pointless?
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I think the best solution would be for you to stop talking
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Can I work as a team on my own?
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FYI I’ve got a hip flask, so if anyone needs a bit of the hair of the dog, I’m right here
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This is a customer announcement: the store will be closing in five minutes, so get the fuck out
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I wouldn’t know you if we didn’t work together and that would be just fine
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