15 Ways To Annoy Your Hostess
1. Show up late for your reservation
If you take the time to make the reservation, get your act together to show up for it. Or at least call, come on people.
2. Bring your screaming, whining children into the dining room
Only sleeping babies allowed. (But also not encouraged.)
3. Or your triple-wide stroller
What in the world are we supposed to do with this monstrosity while you eat?
4. Throw this line around freely: “We’ve been waiting for over an hour”
Newsflash: We know that isn’t true.
5. Or this: “We know the owner”
Oh you know the owner? Well let me just build a table really quick so we can seat you right away!
6. Order food or drinks from them
Wait two seconds and your server will be all over it.
7. Look around for a table before you talk to them
Why don’t you let me take care of that for you.
8. Even worse: Seat yourself
Can you read?
9. Take it upon yourself to move after you’ve already been seated
By all means, disregard that reserved sign! It’s just for decoration anyway.
10. Hang around after you’ve paid your bill and there’s an hour wait
Don’t even worry, there isn’t a huge line of hungry people waiting. TAKE YOUR TIME.
11. Take a table and then only order drinks
Aww that’s adorable! Save it for the bar. Or after 11pm.
12. Glare at them the whole time you wait
I get it, you’re hungry.
13. Or worse, TALK to them the whole time
Just trying to do my job here.
14. Show up with 10 people at 9pm on a Friday night without a reservation
15. Expect to get seated right away because you’re a regular
Of course you can have your usual table! Come back in 30 minutes.