retail lists Archives - Page 17 of 30 - I Hate Working In Retail

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17 Signs You Really Need A F@cking Day Off

Parks and Recreation
Parks and Recreation

1. You clicked on this post. (Hi.)

2. You were desperate enough to pass the time that you clicked on this post even though you have a strong distaste for posts like this. You can’t even respect yourself for reading this right now, but you’re going to finish it, because that’s where you are with life now. Who needs dignity? Not you!

3. You have started to resent every living thing around you, including cats. Most especially cats, actually. You have taken to focusing your rage on their leisurely lifestyle. You have said things to your cat like, “Oh, wouldn’t it be GREAT to be a CAT?! You just sleep and eat and shit all day. REAL DIFFICULT LIFE, SNIFFLES MCWHISKERSON!!!!!” (You are not okay. You are yelling at a cat.)

4. You’re hungover from last night’s happy hour which turned into closing down the bar because you are not really into facing the reality of your life right now, tbh.

5. You cannot remember the last time you were relaxed. Really, you have no recent recollection of being at ease in your life. Real quick think of like a relaxing meadow or something. Does that feeling of calm make you stressed out? Yeah, you’re not okay.

6. You’re about one instance of being micro managed away from losing it all together and quitting your life to go be a professional street juggler or some weird ass shit like that. (Don’t do that, though.)

7. The best part of your day today was eating your sad lunch on your sad lunch break for only one really sad hour. (Hopefully you got fries.)

8. Every part of your body hurts. Even your eyes burn. The space between your fingers aches. You’ve discovered new ligaments in your neck that now have knots on them. The mere act of being alive hurts you.

9. You are the exact embodiment of a person whose soul has been sucked from them. Everything in your life is soul-sucking. Your existence is soul-sucking. Just keeping your eyes open is soul-sucking.

10. You have a very strong sensation of needing a hug from your mom (or whoever in your life represents comfort). You may want to get a good cry going while you’re at it.

11. You haven’t showered in three or four days because you have been trying to sleep as much as you possibly can in the morning, so you’ve been hitting snooze five times minimum and rushing out the door. You also have forgotten breakfast so now you’re hungry all day and everything is sad.

12. You found this post on Facebook because you are on Facebook all the time now. Your life is Facebook. You’re even playing Farmville. (You’re better than that.)

13. Speaking of Facebook, you’ve taken to turning on the chat function and saying what’s up to people you haven’t talked to in like three years because you’re that bored and that burnt out. (Dude, Shelly from high school does not want to chill.)

14. You are willing yourself to get a cold so you have a legitimate reason to call in sick. Did you just lick the bathroom door handle? Gross, but your dedication is commended.

15. Every time you see a crying baby, you’re like, “What do you know of stress, sir? You know nothing of real problems! I could fill a small Koi pond with my tears! Oh, big deal, you have a poopy diaper. MY WHOLE LIFE IS A POOPY DIAPER.”

16. Opening up your email at the beginning of the day gives you so much rage that you feel like you’re about to turn in The Hulk and go smash up some shit.

17. You’re about to share this post and be like, “SO ME, DYINGGGGG.”

 

Sourced from thoughtcatalog.com

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23 Things All Former Video Store Employees Know To Be True

1. The best perk in the world was hiring movies for free.

23 Things All Former Video Store Employees Know To Be True
NBC

2. … In mass quantities, because you considered the store an extension of your personal collection.

23 Things All Former Video Store Employees Know To Be True
Bravo Networks

3. And keeping them all for weeks, much to the dismay of your boss, who was like…

20th Century Fox / Paramount Pictures

20th Century Fox / Paramount Pictures

20th Century Fox / Paramount Pictures

4. You also worked the system by charging snacks to your account, which you never planned to pay off.

23 Things All Former Video Store Employees Know To Be True
Oxygen

5. This scene from Clerks is the most accurate thing you have ever seen, and you’ve seen A LOT, because hello, you worked at a video store.

23 Things All Former Video Store Employees Know To Be True
Miramax Films / Via youtube.com

6. You’ve seen nearly every film within the realm of your interest range from the time that you worked there.

Bravo Networks

Bravo Networks

7. … Regardless of its quality.

23 Things All Former Video Store Employees Know To Be True
Syfy Films

8. Friends ask you for movie recommendations and you get way too excited.

23 Things All Former Video Store Employees Know To Be True
Bravo Networks

9. You would never get to bed at a regular hour, as you’d finish late and stay up all night watching movies.

The CW

Showtime

10. Having first pick of the new releases made you feel like a ~VIP~.

23 Things All Former Video Store Employees Know To Be True
Tristar Pictures

11. Every now and then your boss would ask you to clean the store. You’d be like:

23 Things All Former Video Store Employees Know To Be True
Oxygen

… And then sort of walk aimlessly around the store while holding cleaning products.

12. Calling all the people on the overdue list was a tedious, slow-release nightmare…

23 Things All Former Video Store Employees Know To Be True
FOX

13. … But it helped you perfect the art of sounding chipper while having an uncomfortable conversation.

23 Things All Former Video Store Employees Know To Be True
Bravo Networks

“Hi, this is Stephanie from Blockbuster video! I’m just calling because you’ve got the movie Torque, and it’s actually 72 days overdue??”
“I never hired that.”
“Actually, sir, I remember hiring it out to you, and asking you to return it two weeks ago when you were in the store last, and you didn’t deny hiring it then, sooo…?”
*click*

14. It also taught you how to cope with a customer loudly berating you on a Saturday night in front of a line of 25 customers, while you’re working by yourself, over a 50 cent late fee.

AMC

AMC

AMC

“I’m sixteen years old and being paid minimum wage to deal with you, but would you like me to pay your FIFTY CENT fine out of my purse in front of all these customers you’re holding up while you berate me? Because I can afford it. Also I remember you bringing the movie back late because it happened three days ago.”

15. You’re really, really skilled at answering questions like “You know that movie? The one with that guy from that show? It was on a few weeks ago, you must’ve seen it. You KNOW THE ONE I MEAN!”

Sony Pictures Entertainment

16. You also have a bizarre knack for recalling obscure things about movie covers that help you locate them quickly.

Paramount Pictures

Paramount Pictures

“Do you have The Tracker?”
“Oh yeah! I saw it just before”
*locates DVD by the font on the spine of the case*

17. Sometimes, you’d get drunk on power and experience a teensy, tiny amount of pleasure in calling a teenager’s parents to request permission to rent them an R-rated movie, and then having to relay to them that their parent said no.

23 Things All Former Video Store Employees Know To Be True
The Weinstein Company

… In front of all their friends.

18. The tapes played on a loop were the devil.

FX

FX

The same hour of previews, and two music videos, every hour, for eight hours, four times a week. You still can’t listen to any of the songs that were the featured music videos, because they haunted you in your dreams for long months after they’d been retired from the loop tape.

19. Preview tapes, on the other hand…

23 Things All Former Video Store Employees Know To Be True
MTV

Watching the next month’s releases before they come out? Yes, please.

20. Speaking of tapes, when customers would return their VHS tape without rewinding them, this would be your reaction:

23 Things All Former Video Store Employees Know To Be True
Bravo Networks

21. On the other hand, the anticipation of wondering if your customer crush would come to “visit you” at any moment was the high point of many of your shifts.

23 Things All Former Video Store Employees Know To Be True
ABC Family

22. And you were guilty of checking their account like a creeper to see if they have any rentals due back that day.

23 Things All Former Video Store Employees Know To Be True
Bravo Networks

23. Finally, you made at least one genuine friend after chatting with your regular customers and discovering you have the same taste in films.

23 Things All Former Video Store Employees Know To Be True

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Why Working in Retail Is Like the Worst Torture Ever

 When all your days start to feel like this:

Why Working in Retail Is Like the Worst Torture Ever

Or you just feel like doing this every day:

Why Working in Retail Is Like the Worst Torture Ever

And your daily routine feels a lot like this:

Why Working in Retail Is Like the Worst Torture Ever

When a customer asks to speak with your manager:

Why Working in Retail Is Like the Worst Torture Ever

When a customer tells you, “This other place has that cheaper!”

Why Working in Retail Is Like the Worst Torture Ever

Or when you meet new employees for the first time:

Why Working in Retail Is Like the Worst Torture Ever

When you have to do the dreaded “clopen,” closing and opening the next morning:

Why Working in Retail Is Like the Worst Torture Ever

When your day-to-day thoughts consist of this:

Why Working in Retail Is Like the Worst Torture Ever

Well, either that, or this:

Why Working in Retail Is Like the Worst Torture Ever

When you’re the only person working the cash register and the line is starting to get huge:

Why Working in Retail Is Like the Worst Torture Ever

And then a customer spends five minutes digging around for change and just pays with a bill anyway:

Why Working in Retail Is Like the Worst Torture Ever

When a customer tells you to get something from “the back”:

Why Working in Retail Is Like the Worst Torture Ever

When a customer says, “Your job must be really easy!”

Why Working in Retail Is Like the Worst Torture Ever

When you realize you’ve been working at your job for way longer than you originally planned:

Why Working in Retail Is Like the Worst Torture Ever

When something like THIS happens:

Why Working in Retail Is Like the Worst Torture Ever

Which basically just means it’s time again:

Why Working in Retail Is Like the Worst Torture Ever

When Christmas music makes you want to kill yourself:

Why Working in Retail Is Like the Worst Torture Ever

And holiday shoppers start to look a lot like this to you:

Why Working in Retail Is Like the Worst Torture Ever

And this becomes your new catchphrase:

Why Working in Retail Is Like the Worst Torture Ever

Actually, the whole holiday season is basically like this:

Why Working in Retail Is Like the Worst Torture Ever

When you realize that people like this definitely do not exist:

Why Working in Retail Is Like the Worst Torture Ever

When you have to take inventory:

Why Working in Retail Is Like the Worst Torture Ever

When a customer thinks this will somehow help:

Why Working in Retail Is Like the Worst Torture Ever

Or that you rang up the wrong price:

Why Working in Retail Is Like the Worst Torture Ever

Or that this is a hilarious joke:

Why Working in Retail Is Like the Worst Torture Ever

And all you want to do is say this:

Why Working in Retail Is Like the Worst Torture Ever

When you have to grab something from an unreasonably high height:

Why Working in Retail Is Like the Worst Torture Ever

When you have to clean the bathrooms…or anything for that matter:

Why Working in Retail Is Like the Worst Torture Ever

When all your friends are excited about this weekend, and you realize you have to work Saturday and Sunday:

Why Working in Retail Is Like the Worst Torture Ever

When the total is $20.22 and the customer hands you two $20 bills:

Why Working in Retail Is Like the Worst Torture Ever

When a customer demonstrates his or her listening skills like this:

Why Working in Retail Is Like the Worst Torture Ever

When your relationship with your manager is basically like this:

Why Working in Retail Is Like the Worst Torture Ever

When you…wait, nevermind. Everything is the worst about retail. EVERYTHING.

Why Working in Retail Is Like the Worst Torture Ever
Sourced from buzzfeed.com