retail lists Archives - Page 9 of 30 - I Hate Working In Retail

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15 things you wish you were brave enough to say at work

Here’s how work works: someone pays you to do stuff, you do the stuff and you get paid. But this is only half the story, you’re also being paid not to do stuff. You’re paid not to turn up looking like a scruff, you’re paid not to give away the company secrets and you’re paid not to speak your mind. This, as you will know, is sometimes easier said than done.

There are times when we would just love to say what we really think. If only we had the gall to follow through with it… poohead. THERE, I SAID IT.

  1. Oh I don’t actually work here

    GIF
  2. Get the manager? I AM the manager

    GIF
  3. Nothing is for sale. This isn’t a shop. You’re imagining this

    GIF
  4. I KNOW HOW TO PICK UP A BOX

    And why do I have to wear my gym clothes?

  5. I’ll check if it’s in stock but really I’m just going to play on my phone in the warehouse for a few minutes

    GIF
  6. Sorry, I’m too tired to do anything today, come back tomorrow

    GIF
  7. I’m not coming in tomorrow and I’m not explaining why

    GIF
  8. You ain’t the boss of me!

    GIF
  9. I can see your point, that’s how I know it’s stupid

    GIF
  10. Has it occurred to anyone else that all of this is entirely pointless?

    GIF
  11. I think the best solution would be for you to stop talking

    GIF
  12. Can I work as a team on my own?

    GIF
  13. FYI I’ve got a hip flask, so if anyone needs a bit of the hair of the dog, I’m right here

    GIF
  14. This is a customer announcement: the store will be closing in five minutes, so get the fuck out

    GIF
  15. I wouldn’t know you if we didn’t work together and that would be just fine

    Sourced from studentbeans.com

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10 Signs Your Tip Is Probably Going To Suck

1. The one person at the table who was born in the 1800s is the one who insists on paying the check.

2. As soon as the customer sits down, they say something like, “Well, the last time I ate here, the service was horrible!”

3. Someone at the table says, “I don’t mean to be any trouble, but…” and then they continue to be nothing but trouble.

4. Everyone at the table is between the ages of 14 and 18 years old.

5. They begin their meal with a prayer.

6. They want to know how much something is going to cost with the tax.

7. The whole table only wants water to drink but then asks for extra lemons and a sugar caddy.

8. There is a Groupon on the table.

9. The table has at least five women at it who are all wearing a red hat and purple clothing.

10. The person who grabs the check says, “I’m a really big tipper.”

tip

Sourced from shiftgig.com

 

 

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The 15 Retail Employees From Hell. Do You Work With Any Of These?

The most important assets any business has are their employees.

Sometimes you discover you’ve got a co-worker from hell.

You know, the Bitter Betty employee who looks like they sucked on a lemon.

employee from hell retail tips

The 15 Employees From Hell

1. The Know-It-All. No matter how you tell this person how you want something done, they always say that they already do it that way… but they continue to keep doing it wrong.

2. The Negative Nancy. Nothing is going right. No one is doing anything well. Everything is someone else’s fault. They suck the exuberance out of living.

3. The Child. This one is constantly making a list of what they are going to do, but they never get it done – unless you continually nag them. They always leave messes for others to clean up, and they are out the door at 5:00 regardless of whether they’ve finished or not…usually not.

4. The Zombie. These are the ones who think if their body shows up, that’s enough; that their job is to just be present for their shift. No effort, no engagement, no self-directed activity. They are bored from the moment they clock in.

5. The Thief. Obviously, these are the ones who steal your merchandise.

6. The Discounter. These are the ones who find a way to offer unauthorized discounts to customers to make sales. They’ll say they had to price-match, or they ‘ll hide evidence of having used discount codes for customers who did not qualify for those discounts. They then compound their crime by bragging about their numbers, claiming they were generated because the customerslike their service better.

7. The Lawyer. This demon does only what is in their job description instead of understanding that they have to go with the flow.

8. The Busybody. They love to know everyone’s business. And they gossip everyone’s business to everyone… about their employers, other employees and customers.

9. The Arguer. They never like the way you do a task, a display or a sale. They want to do it theirway. They’ll argue to your face that you’re wrong. They’ll argue just to be right.

10. The Phantom. These ones are always texting or taking personal calls while they ignore all of your customers.

11. The Corpse. These are the ones with that deer-in-the-headlights expression when you ask them to do something. They look at you and smile without a nod or indication they heard you. They just stand there. They’d rather be dead than be your employee.

12. The Soulless Plodder. They take forever to clean, stack, organize or price something. Their goal is to stretch out a job for as long as they can, showing just enough progress to say they aregetting it done.

13. The Despot. When the boss is away, they do everything except what they are supposed to be doing; in their eyes they have free reign. They take long breaks, don’t greet customers or do the rest of their job. When they do deal with customers, they are short and rude and given enough freedom, close up early.

14. The Ninja. They are the ones who hide behind the rack, find things to do in the stockroom to keep them off the floor, or disappear as soon as someone enters their section. They would rather be stacking pants, re-pricing or cleaning. They don’t like to talk to anyone…especially your customers.

15. The Distractor. These employees spend all their time preventing other employees from working. No one gets anything done…and that’s fine with them.

Sourced from retaildoc.com