28 Signs You’ve Worked At A Grocery Store For Way Too Long
1. You don’t think children should be allowed anywhere.
2. And you know customers are animals who never learned trash goes in a TRASH CAN.
3. Seriously, who thinks this is an OKAY place to leave a dirty diaper?
4. Honestly, this barely phases you anymore.
5. And neither does children’s toy shoved in a salmon’s mouth.
6. You’re no longer impressed by the vulgar creations in the spice section.
8. Yes, you know this doesn’t look like a wine holder.
9. And yes, you understand that most “specials” aren’t very special.
10. Some sales really are too good to be true.
11. And yes, this is the only aisle that matters.
12. You know how to make things easy for shoppers.
14. And you know Eurythmics puns suck.
15. But masturbation puns are something the whole family can enjoy.
16. You know these are all jalapeños.
17. And that this is Land O’ Lakes Butter.
18. You’ve see your fair share of apology cakes.
19. And people climbing on the displays.
20. You shake your head in shame when you realize what your stocking on the shelves.
21. You take your creative outlets quite seriously.
22. Like REALLY seriously.
23. You know kids are literally the worst.
24. And potatoes don’t belong with the Franzia…
25. Drug tests aren’t near the Cheetos…
26. And customers fequently make questionable decisions.
27. But for Christ’s sake you cannot understand why people are utterly incapable of PUTTING SHIT BACK WHERE THEY FOUND IT.
28. Oh yeah, and you know kids would cause a lot less trouble if they’re locked in the freezer.
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